Sunday, December 22, 2024

As a professional dating expert, I help people find love for a living. But even I was suckered by a cruel catfish for SIX years – here’s how I discovered the truth and turned the tables on the charlatan who fooled even me

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A dating expert has revealed how she was catfished for six years by a handsome stranger who claimed to be a high-flying property developer who drove a Ferrari and offered to buy her a $4million house.

Professional matchmaker Louanne Ward has exposed her former lover Mitchell* as a penniless chef who was cheating on his long-term girlfriend with two other women and driving a red Hyundai, which he called ‘the Ferrari’.

Louanne was living in Perth with her teenage son in 2018 when Mitchell found her professional Facebook profile and sent her a message: ‘You’re so beautiful. You look familiar, have we met?’

Three days earlier, she had met three men in front of a sandwich maker in the business lounge at Sydney Airport, and asked if he was one of those men.

Mitchell replied: ‘Yes, I was.’

They were both in their forties and the relationship progressed quickly; he lived in Sydney so they only saw each other three times in person during their six years together, but Louanne didn’t mind.

‘I was pursuing dreams and goals and things I want to do, and what actually I preferred was to come to Sydney, have two weeks with him, and go back to Perth,’ she told Daily Mail Australia.

Louanne Ward (pictured) is a professional match-maker who was lied to for six years by her ex-boyfriend

Despite seeing each other infrequently, they kept the romance alive with daily declarations of love and all the steamy texts that anyone would expect from lovers on opposite sides of the country.

He sent her so many photos of his penis that she had to ask him to stop. He also insisted he was a wealthy businessman who successfully invested in cryptocurrency and offered to buy her a $4million house, which she refused. 

But that all changed in May when Louanne accidentally came across Mitchell’s long-term girlfriend’s Instagram page and saw a number of photos of them together within the last six years.

There were photos of them on international holidays, and Louanne realised there were items in the woman’s Instagram photos that had also appeared in shots Mitchell had sent her.

‘I was going through her profiles trying to put links in place, and they fell into place,’ she said.

‘I found out I was catfished because he made out that he was someone that he was not, and he gaslit me every time I asked him if he was seeing anyone else.’

She confronted him about it and he was forced to come clean that he had actually been with the woman on Instagram for eight years, and he was dating a third woman at the same time.

Louanne felt embarrassed and ashamed that she – as a match-maker and relationship expert – had been sucked into Mitchell’s web of lies for six years, but she decided to share her story because she knows her experience is all too common.

‘Ever since this has all come out, so many people have said, “Oh god, this happened to me too,”‘ she said.

‘And they’re not weak wallflowers – they’re strong and resilient. The opposite of being betrayed is being supported, and that’s what I want to do for people.’

Louanne Ward's ex had been seeing another woman for eight years - and she was shocked to learn that she was the other woman. Mitchell* sent Louanne this photo of himself with a Ferrari, saying he had bought a new car

Louanne Ward’s ex had been seeing another woman for eight years – and she was shocked to learn that she was the other woman. Mitchell* sent Louanne this photo of himself with a Ferrari, saying he had bought a new car

In reality, Mitchell drove a red Hyundai which he called 'the Ferrari' (pictured)

In reality, Mitchell drove a red Hyundai which he called ‘the Ferrari’ (pictured)

‘Our love story’

Louanne had thought the start of her love story with Mitchell was when he sent her a message after meeting her at the airport.

‘I work in romance, so for me, that was the start of our love story,’ she said.

She later found out that Mitchell wasn’t one of the men at the airport – his message to her had been unsolicited, but he jumped at the opportunity to forge the connection when she asked.

During that first conversation, he told her he lived in Sydney but owned a house in the elite Perth suburb of Peppermint Grove, where he planned to permanently relocate.

He said he wanted to retire early because he’d made a lot of money and wanted to enjoy it, and had just one more development to finish, which was about three months out.

After that, they FaceTimed and messaged each other about everything – lust turned into love, and he started saying things like, ‘You’re the girl for me, you’re the only girl I’m ever going to marry’.

She liked the fact he seemed to have his own life set up in Sydney and, without much of a physical relationship, they connected on a deep and intellectual level.

Alarm bells started going off after they met in person for the first time in Sydney in 2019: they spent the afternoon together and he promised to return to her hotel that evening, but ghosted her for two days.

Once she was back in Perth, he told her he’d been in hospital and couldn’t possibly have messaged her because he was ‘focused on healing’.

He stood her up twice more after that, but she said he always talked her around.

Louanne could never prove his excuses were false, and she loved him so it was difficult to be as critical as she would have been if it happened to a friend or a client.

Mitchell continually told Louanne he would move to Perth and marry her (texts pictured)

Mitchell continually told Louanne he would move to Perth and marry her (texts pictured)

At one stage, Mitchell offered to buy Louanne a $4million house, even though he wasn't wealthy at all

At one stage, Mitchell offered to buy Louanne a $4million house, even though he wasn’t wealthy at all

False promises

Louanne was initially happy with their long-distance arrangement; however, as their relationship progressed, Mitchell continually promised to move to Perth and she wanted him to stay true to his word.

They saw each other in person once more before the Covid pandemic started and the WA borders closed, which meant he didn’t have to come up with reasons as to why he couldn’t see her for two years.

Throughout the pandemic, he would constantly assure her they would be together and live ‘the most beautiful life’ once state borders reopened and his developments were finished.

But it never happened.

WhatsApp messages show Louanne asking him why they couldn’t be together and asking him if he was seeing someone else.

‘I gave him the opportunity to tell me that he has somebody in his life, because I logically looked at the situation and it didn’t make sense that we would not be together after Covid,’ she said.

‘I said to him, “The only thing that makes sense is that you’ve got a partner, and I want you to know I get it and I understand.”‘

By 2022 when the pandemic was over, she reached boiling point, telling him: ‘Not sure where the truth lies but nothing you promised me turned out to be the truth.’

He replied: ‘Well I have never given up on our dream darling Louanne.’

She said: ‘This is too painful, enough is enough. You aren’t, haven’t and won’t do anything to bring [this to] fruition… the idea of a happy relationship is outweighed by the reality of one.’

He said: ‘I WILL Louanne … I will endeavor to get to WA to live to I can be with you, love you and hold you xxxxxx.’

Every time she asked him whether he was seeing anyone else, he denied it and quickly steered the conversation to sex. 

Every time Louanne tried to ask Mitchell why he wouldn't move to be with her, he would turn the conversation to sex

Every time Louanne tried to ask Mitchell why he wouldn’t move to be with her, he would turn the conversation to sex

She sent him a number of messages over the past six years, asking if he was seeing anyone else - he always denied it

She sent him a number of messages over the past six years, asking if he was seeing anyone else – he always denied it

Love triangle

Louanne found out Mitchell was cheating on her by accident, when she was looking for a gift for a friend and stumbled upon a shop on Instagram.

The owner of the shop was a woman who was pictured with Mitchell in different locations, and over the course of several years.

‘I’m looking at her Instagram photos, and I’m looking back at photos he sent me, and there’s her hat in the background, and there’s a woman’s shoe I never noticed in the background of another picture,’ Louanne said.

Louanne realised the intimate photos he had sent her were taken in his girlfriend’s bathroom.

She also pieced together messages from another point in their relationship when he hadn’t spoken to her for a few weeks. He told her he had flown to New York for business, but Instagram showed he was actually holidaying with his main girlfriend.

Louanne made a video confronting Mitchell, and asked him to explain the situation.

Over the phone, he confessed he did have another love interest and described her as a ‘lover of past times’.

She replied: ‘How fast are the times?’

He said: ‘Well, we’ve been on and off for 10 years.’

When Mitchell told Louanne he was ‘pretty sure’ she knew about the other woman, she blew up because he had spent so long denying it, and had previously made her feel bad for asking the question.

Later, she found out Mitchell also had third woman.

Mitchell apologised profusely and told Louanne he was a ‘despicable person’, but she didn’t believe he meant it.

Louanne confronted Mitchell and he asked her to forgive him. He said his behavior was 'despicable'

Louanne confronted Mitchell and he asked her to forgive him. He said his behavior was ‘despicable’ 

Louanne has tried to make peace with the fact that Mitchell lied to her for six years

Louanne has tried to make peace with the fact that Mitchell lied to her for six years

The truth 

Louanne eventually decided to approach Mitchell’s girlfriend because she knew he was still lying to her, and would likely cheat on her again.

The girlfriend explained she had been with Mitchell for eight years and had caught him cheating before.

He told the last woman he had a lot of money – just like he told Louanne.

She laughed when asked if Mitchell drove a Ferrari, and explained he no money, everything he knew about cryptocurrency came from her, and the ‘Ferrari’ was actually a red Hyundai.

Louanne realised Mitchell had never intended move to Perth, he didn’t own any property, nor did he travel internationally, or intend to marry her.

He was just a serial cheater who stole six years of her life.

‘What I’m struggling with is the opportunities I lost seeing men who were genuine and interested,’ she said.

‘I’m a match-maker and I know the sexual value of a woman in her forties and a woman in her fifties, and he stole those years from me.’

Louanne felt as though she had let Mitchell lie to her, and was ashamed because her friends had tried to tell her he wasn’t who he appeared to be. 

‘If this was happening to a friend or a client, I would have been able to see it straight away, but I couldn’t see it happening to me,’ she said. 

Through her conversations with others, she realised a lot of people – men and women – had similar stories, but didn’t speak about them because they felt ashamed.

She decided going public with her own horror story might help others understand what happened to them is not their fault – they were simply lied to.

*Name has been changed.

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